This has gone too far.

Just in from the radio they were talking about what the ‘food trend’ has been for this year, and eventually they got on to coffee, and they had this chief barista or something as a guest talking about how they are ‘breaking barriers’ with new coffee experiences. One of their new philosophies was “sensory annihilation,” and an example of this was where they start you off with drinking (possibly from the one cup) cold mineral water which slowly is replaced by hot coffee. And another of their inventions was the ‘upside-down (or reverse?) latte,’ to which the host of the show’s reply was “What was wrong with it the right way up??” The host also suggested some other amusing new experiences that could be tried out, such as when you order a special coffee, instead of drinking it normally they smear it on your chest, and then pour cold milk all over you.

Nowadays there’s more freaken types of coffee than there are species of plant! I’m just waiting for the day when you have to order you coffee by its latinate Linnaean Scientific name: “Ah yes, could I please have a large Caffeocephalocereus mochalatinadae, no sugar.

Because of this I am considering writing a letter to whoever is responsible for starting these things, and it goes a little something like this:

Dear douchebag,

Please kill yourself.

Signed, An appeal to commonsense.

p.s. I am not a crank-pot.


Well, what do you think?

See now my coffee of choice is a double shot latte with three sugars, so no.. i do not agree with you.

I also learned how to make some pretty damn good coffees over in england, including how to make a layered latte that tasted damned fantastic.

So again.. screw you.

Um, Andy- for most of these Barista's they have to invent a new Coffee (either desert or counter) to gain the title of Barista (i'm sure i'm spelling that correctly). in addition to that, they love doing it and want to try new things (just like chefs)- so stop deriding other people's careers! They're not hurting anyone, and they'll still make you a flat white you un-cultured philistine!

just kidding, i like coffee but some of the crap that pours out of pretentious coffee connoisseurs is pure bollocks!

Well I'm sending the letter anyway! ... I wonder if it'll reach you. Both of you!

p.s. "uncultured philistine" is a tautology, you Dorcus Malorcus.

Don't give me the whole ATM Machine's not a real sentence run-a-round

is a tautology a double negative? Or is it just saying two words that mean the same thing. Because 'uncultured philistine' i would say has passed well into the vernacular. Also, even if a philistine is uncultured then an uncultured philistine is worse!

Yeah, it's like saying "your the worst person ever" +1... which as we all know in geek speak, is the worst insult ever. Ever.

Tom wrote:is a tautology a double negative?

Naw dawg.

Tom wrote:Or is it just saying two words that mean the same thing.

Pretty much; it's also like in logic where you say "Hey if, Step 1 is true, then Step 1 must be true! Theory proved!" Hey man I heard you like grammar so I put a grammar in your car so you can grammar while you drive.

Instead of just putting in a question mark, i thought i might try this:

I dunno... Coffee can have very subtle tastes depending on where the bean is grown and it certain conditions. People learn to appreciate these differences.

If this sort of thing offends you, why haven't you been raging over wine appreciation?

Hey, good point. I've been neglecting a whole field of toffee-nosed silly buggers to which I can direct my crazy, cat-hurling rants.

You bloody winos! Die!

p.s. Glen, that picture is pretty tops.

I can tell the difference between butter and I Can't Believe It's Not Butter.

No you can't Mr Redfearn, no one can!

Hey- i draw the line at raging at the w(h)ine! i quite like wine and cheese tasting (individually greet- but together!)

Trevor!!! Makes!!!! An!!!! Apearance!!!!

So all we need to do to get Trev to post is to give him an opportunity to display his almost encycolpedic knowledge of Simpson's quotes... genius...

Tom, what does that have to do with wine/ cheese/ coffee?

What does your post have to do with wine/cheese/coffee..

and i will tell you.. trevor is like a fine beverage, or a cheese. He is best enjoyed all the time anywhere, especially in the company of beautiful women on a beautiful summer evening... include a bug zapper somewhere there.

My post didn't mention Trev...

But all it was actually referring to was my post - ergo you were not discussing coffee

Visa vi- Concordantly!

Red wine (up to a glass and a half daily) is good for your skin... wait this isn't the random facts thread...

You two are quite the regular 'Odd couple.'

Who's the slob?

Back to the Coffee:
What i don't get is why instant coffee tastes so hideous- and yes i have tried a few in my years... coffee isn't a reticent flavour, it's not hard to replicate- so why can't Nescafe make a decent instant? i hate waiting 5 extra minutes for my fix!

And Coffee art isn't appreciated in our society enough!

Glenjamin wrote:And Coffee art isn't appreciated in our society enough!

With good cause!

It's bloody hard to do Andy! And yet guys like Dawkins who don't have a clue what they're talking about are celebrated!

Commentator Whispers:The interesting thing to note is that despite Glenjamin not really liking Dawkins, he only threw that comment in to fire Andy up... let's wait and see what happens next!